Go Ahead, Ask Me Anything

Just wait till tomorrow.

I've been reading "Little Britches" to the kids and I love all the life lessons we are learning. The father teaches Little Britches that he shouldn't ask questions about things that he can figure out for himself. This is something I really want to teach to my kids. Not because I'm a great Mom and teacher but because I would just like them to shut up sometimes so I can think my own thoughts.

A couple weeks ago we were driving home from a very stressful activity and I thought I would lose my mind if I had to answer one more question. I had to say, "No more questions! If you have a question that you can't answer for yourself then write it down and ask me later!"

This brought so many more questions to their little minds that I could practically see them oozing out of their eyeballs. It's a well know fact that if you make a child think with their mouth closed then their head will explode and I wanted to see how long that would take.

I could see it all in their eyes, "But how can I write my questions down when I don't have a pencil or paper? If I can't ask my question then how will I remember it long enough to write it down when we get home? I can't even remember the last time I ate. Did we eat breakfast this morning? Am I hungry? I'm awake so I must be hungry. When and what are we going to be eating next or will I starve to death? I've never starved to death before, not that I can remember, but I feel certain that starvation is imminent and I might cease to exist if I don't hear every detail of the next 24 hours of my life over and over and over again. Where are we going? What are we doing? What's for dinner? Why doesn't my Mother love me? Now what were we talking about again? I think I'll ask Mom and then I'll find out when we're going to the nickel arcade because I never seem to get a straight answer about that."

"Mom?"

"Don't say it!"

"But I didn't say anything!"

"Yes you did. You were going to ask me a question."

"No I wasn't. I was just going to say, when are we..."

"That's a question!"

"Ok, are we..."

"Another question!"

"Well then I don't know how to ask you without using a question!"

"That's the whole point! Don't ask it!"


Oh and Little Britches also drinks coffee, starts supporting the family when he's 9 and gets beaten with a 2X4 for stealing. I'm thinking about how we're going to work those into our homeschool as well.