Some fun things pregnancy can teach you.

• Your two year old stinks. You might not have ever noticed that before. Come to think of it, everyone in your family stinks but they're not hanging in your face all day so you don't seem to notice.


• Clutter can literally cause you to have a nervous breakdown and start throwing things so if clutter is a problem at your house you might want to start boxing things up before it all gets broken.


• To be eternally grateful for every moment you spent teaching your seven year old to cook because she is now the sole reason everyone in the house hasn't perished from hunger.


• The love and joy of bringing another soul into the world can cause you to despise and resent everyone around you.


• Going to the gym and working out can actually help you feel better. Until you get home and puke your guts up that is.


• Chickens aren't as cute as you thought they were. They stink and their offensive eggs are toxic to pregnant women.


• Taking Unisom for your morning sickness will not actually help you sleep better. It will just make you have crazy dreams in between the sleepless hours.


• Two year olds adjust amazingly well to having a sick mother. They learn to cut their own hair and then rub a container of foot cream in it that takes a week to wash out, escape from the house twenty times a day to play in chicken poop and roll in the mud and torment their older brother and sister until no one can stand her and she is shipped off to Grandma's house.


• Pregnant women have super human hearing powers. Translation - every sounds your children make will make you want to claw your ears drums out. Or at the very least, tie them to their beds so they stop running through the house. Around here we call that "time-out".


• You are as incapable of handling your pregnancy as you thought you were going to be.