Digital Mothering

We've hit an all time lazy.

You know how I'm so pregnant that I can't get off the couch? Hanging out on the couch gives me lots of time to devise new ways of making sure I never have to get off the couch again. At least until the baby is born.

My newest strategy involves a cool little invention called a digital camera. Yesterday I asked Victor to clean up the front entryway and Persistence to clean up the bathroom. Instead of getting up to check the rooms when they were done like a good Mother is supposed to do, I had them take photos. Then we looked at the photos together and went over each spot they missed. You know, the toys and clutter that are invisible to everyone but Mom?

All clean! The kids had fun with the photos and I didn't have to get up! Ingenious or lazy? You decide.

I just realized though that this plan isn't fool proof. I mean, look who they're related to. What's to stop them from kicking their dirty underwear out of the way while they take the shot? I wouldn't put it past the lazy little trouble makers.

I would have to forgive them though considering my ten year old made me pancakes for breakfast, bacon and eggs for lunch, a spaghetti dinner and my eight year old baked strawberry shortcake for dessert. I can't wait to find out what's on the menu for tomorrow. Am I spoiled or what???

Talk About Bed Making

Welcome to Talk About Tuesday! If you are new, check out the Guidelines before posting. Thanks for joining us!

My Secret Recipe for Teaching Kids to Make Their Beds

Bed making has eluded this family for years but now, finally, all five members are making their beds every single day! You might call it a miracle but I call it years of calculated planning and patience. Here is my fool proof method:

• Announce to your husband as soon as you get married that you want the bed made. Ignore him when he says that you never made the bed before he married you so why should you start now.


• Nag husband about making the bed for a year or so and then give up and live with an unmade bed. Note: I sleep at night but my husband most often sleeps during the day so I could make the bed all I wanted when I got out of it but it was never made by the time I got into it.


• Try again a couple years later and give up again.


• Have some kids.


• Religiously make their beds every day because you can and they will stay made.

• When the kids are old enough spend a couple years teaching and helping them make their beds.


• Figure that eventually they will want to and be able to do it on their own.


• Get over that fairy tale and start nagging them every day to make their beds.


• Give up nagging and start threatening. Do that for a few years.


• Take away all their covers and make them sleep on a cold mattress.

• Don't do that last one but think about it really hard for a while.


• Mention again to your husband that you would like the bed made every day and couldn't he please just straighten his pillows and pull up the covers on his side of the bed when he gets out of it.


• Be amazed that he actually starts doing this. Most of the time.


• Wonder why all of a sudden he doesn't toss and turn and mess up the bed covers like he used to.


• Let your kids make a new family rule that any child who forgets to make their bed before they eat breakfast has to make everyone else's bed the next morning.

• Sit back and enjoy having children that make their beds EVERY SINGLE MORNING all by themselves without being reminded!


• Wonder why all of a sudden your children don't toss and turn and mess up the bed covers like they used to.


• Pat yourself on the back for having such an excellent detailed plan and the fortitude to follow through with it for 12 years.

Alternate plan in case you have a Lovely living in your house.

• When your child is three years old teach her how to make her bed.


• Make it with her for one week.


• Now that she knows how to do it on her own, ask her to make it every day as soon as she gets up.


• Don't be surprised at all that she does it.


• Hug and kiss her every morning when she runs to tell you how pretty her bed looks.


• Repeat every day after her nap.


• Mommy lives happily ever after.


• The end.

*Important - Please link to your individual Talk About Tuesday post instead of your home page or else my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder will have to spend time fixing the links. Here is how you link to an individual post if you’ve never done it before: Right click on the date at the bottom of the post you want to link to (or the post title depending on where you blog) click “Copy Shortcut” and then paste it into Mr. Linky.

The Amazing Dishwashing Boy

Here's an update of our new Master's Program.

Victor has been working on it for over a month and has earned 20 credits. He needs 30 to graduate. Every day that he washes the dishes and does a good job he earns a credit. The first week went great of course. He was highly motivated and there were no problems.

After that things went a little downhill. One day he didn't do such a good job scrubbing the sink out but I passed him off anyway. One day he didn't get started on them on his own so I had to remind him but I passed him off anyway. Then the dishes weren't getting very clean. One night it was 8:00 and the dishes still weren't put away. Things got worse and worse until I finally said, no more, and he wasn't earning any credits. There were tears.

He tried harder. He earned credits for a few days. Then he didn't. Then he was just mad at me. I re-explained the program. He didn't want to understand it. He wanted to be mad at me.

Then for some reason it finally sunk in and this morning he washed and dried and put away all the dishes before I even got out of bed. Apparently we're understanding each other again and he's back on the program.

Since we're making this up as we go along, Stranger and I have one question. Once he does become a Master Dishwasher what if he gets lazy and I have to start managing and monitoring him again? Does he get demoted? I'm not interested in keeping track of the days he does and doesn't deserve to get paid for washing dishes. In my mind it's all or nothing because the whole point of the program is for me to have one less thing to worry about. I guess we'll find out when we get there.

He's so lucky he gets to be the oldest and experimented on every day! He also has an idea for another master program; Master Van Cleaner. Sounds good to me!

I Love It When They Use Their Brains

I know they have smart little heads but I wish they would use them more often. Do you ever feel that way about your kids? My ten year old came up with this idea in a moment of brilliance or sheer frustration. Either way I was excited.

I came home from a thrift store a week ago with this wire rack that cost 50 cents. It looks like it's for holding pot lids but I thought my son could use it for a drying rack for plates or pans when he does dishes. Apparently not because he tried it for a couple days and stopped using it. Then it sat next to the sink for several more days doing nothing. Until...

Frustrated with the cutting boards that are always propped up next to the sink and always falling over, he grabbed the rack and stuck the cutting boards in it sideways. Who would have thought? It's perfect!!!

Not only does it hold the cutting boards but we can fit a couple cookie sheets in it to dry too. It's funny because I kept looking at that rack trying to figure out what to do with it but it never occurred to me to do something so simple as turn it sideways.

I used to get in trouble with teachers because I always tried to find the easiest way to sew a project or write a computer program. They didn't like it because it wasn't THEIR way. I'm open to ANY way that makes my life easier.

I always tell people, if you want to find the easiest way to do a job, just ask your kids. They are lazy enough to come up with the best ideas. And any idea that makes their job easier will make your life easier because they will work faster and have more fun with it.

Now if I could just get it through their heads that hanging their coat up when they walk in the door is easier then hunting for it later. That piece of information always seems to get lost in the vastness of their big brains.

---

P.S.

My son and his big brain are learning html so he just taught me how to make a line. All you have to do is type <hr/> when you are in "Edit Html" mode. Cool! Now I'm going to be adding lines willy nilly to all my posts.

Mom's First Credit Union

I've been trying to teach my kids to budget money by giving them allowances and responsibilities to go along with it. It's called Mom's First Credit Union and you can read more about it here. The trouble is that I have trouble letting them spend the money on anything but what they are supposed to be spending it on. The result is that they have never run out and therefore aren't really learning anything.

My ten year old son loves to save but has been spending more and more money the past several months (I was very brave let it happen!) until now we finally have results. He is not only out of cash but he is in debt $9 because we just realized he forgot to total in the $50 that he spent on his basketball league this year. He's going to have to take money out of his savings account to cover it and it's just about killing him.

When we go places he will sadly say, " I guess I'm not buying anything since I don't have any money." I am very sympathetic, "Ya, that's too bad," but secretly rejoicing inside. Poor kid!

The other day he was moping about it again so I told him to look through his checkbook and tell me where he might have wasted his money. After studying it for a few minutes he sadly read me the list: junk food, socks (because he ruins his he has to buy more), too much on Christmas presents, library fines, etc. He even had to spend $16.00 filling a cavity at the dentist!

Now if that doesn't make me the meanest Mom in the world I don't know what does. I got tired of nagging my kids to brush and floss their teeth (when I asked them if they had brushed they would lie to me) so I told them six months ago that they were their teeth and if they didn't want to take care of them then there was nothing I could do about it but they were going to start paying for their own dental work. They have been doing a pretty good job brushing ever since but Victor still had to have a cavity fixed. I hope it helps them both learn that taking care of their teeth is a serious business.

So Victor is finally learning what I intended all along. Money (teeth too!) doesn't last forever and he has to make difficult choices. At this point I still help them with those choices but when my kids are twelve they will be on their own. They will be in charge of their own finances and I am staying out of it, come what may. I would rather they learn with a few pennies and dollars when they're young than wait till they are adults and waste thousands like I did.

Smart Habit Saturday

Welcome! If you are new to SHS find out all about it here: Getting Started with SHS. Click here to read more SHS posts. Please don't forget to link back to this post so your readers can find out more about SHS.

I didn't spend 15 minutes every day working on my studio (office/craft room) this week but I did spend two good days cleaning up. The first day I walked into it and about wanted to cry because I was so everwhelmed that I didn't even know where to start. You never feel that way do you? Finally I started throwing everything that didn't belong in there into boxes and got it out. I also got my knitting supplies organized which had been taking over because I've been knitting up a storm lately.

The next day my girls helped by putting away everything in the to-go boxes. My three year old put away an entire box of stuff by herself for the first time! She was excited to help so that was my clue that it would be a good teaching moment. I sat down with her and we talked about where each thing belonged. She went on her way and in a few minutes she returned with an empty box. I was excited but she was even more excited about what she had accomplished! As far as I know she put everything away properly because I haven't found any suprises. My older kids used to like to hide things instead of putting them away so then they just got to try again. They have finally figured out that it's easier to put things away correctly the FIRST time. It's easier AND it makes your Mother happier!

The second day I also vacuumed and dusted every square inch of my studio. It's looking better and there is room now to start doing paperwork. See? I can do this! I think I can. I think I can. Stay tuned for more excitment next week!

If you are new and you want to catch up on last year - Smart Habit Saturday 2007

*Important - Please link to your individual SMART Habit post instead of your home page or else my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder will have to spend time fixing the links. Here is how you link to an individual post if you’ve never done it before: Right click on the date at the bottom of the post you want to link to (or the post title depending on where you blog) click “Copy Shortcut” and then paste it into Mr. Linky.

Master Dishwasher

Oh how you wish you had one of these at your house!

You know my 10 year old son has been washing our dishes by himself for over a year now. That's his job every day and he has to wash them by hand. Yes, I am astounded that he's still doing it and he doesn't complain. Well, we have some new developments happening around here that I am excited about.

A friend of ours mentioned that her kids can become Masters at their jobs and start getting paid to do them. Our kids get an allowance every month but it's not tied to jobs at all. They do their jobs no matter what and they get their allowance no matter what. I have always been adamant about that. But Stranger really liked the idea of a Master's program so he kept mentioning it to me (bugging me about it) until I finally caved in.

We started talking about what it would be worth to have him do the dishes every day without me reminding him or checking up on him or telling him to hurry up already. That would be worth A LOT! So a couple months ago we talked to the kids about it and told them that if they wanted to become Masters at their jobs then we would start paying them. They had to do them perfectly, without supervision for 30 days before they could graduate into the program. Neither of them were interested.

I thought it was odd because my son especially LOVES money and why do something for free if you can get paid to do it? It didn't make sense to me but we went along our merry way for a couple months until last week when I was working on the computer and Victor was doing something strange in the kitchen.

He wasn't just washing dishes. He was washing them QUICKLY, without playing in those shiny, distracting soap bubbles. Then when he was done he scrubbed out the sink and wiped off the counters. What? And then I saw him taking the garbage out. Excuse me? And then he got out the vacuum and cleaned the kitchen floor and put the vacuum away. HELLO!!! It was at that point that I about fell off my chair but I did some deep breathing exercises and pretended that nothing unusual was going on.

When he was all done he walked over and said, "You know that thing you and Dad talked about with our jobs?"

"No."

"You know that thing where we get paid to do them?"

"No," I was still clueless because I had forgotten all about it.

"YOU KNOW, that thing where I do my job for 30 days and then you pay me???" Hello stupid Mother!

Ok, yes. I remembered. He wanted to become a Master Dishwasher and he was starting that day! He has been working on it for almost a week now and he's doing a fabulous job. We still haven't decided what we will be paying him (not what he's worth!) but of course along with getting more money he will be getting more responsibilities for spending that money. We don't just give our kids money to blow on candy and junk but that is a whole other post.

I can't tell you how excited I am about having a Master Dishwasher in the house! I was talking to my 8 year old tonight and asked her if she was interested in becoming a master at her jobs as well and she said, "No."

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because I hate doing jobs."

"Then wouldn't you rather get paid for doing them instead of doing them for free?"

"No, because I would still hate them."

Ok, that totally makes sense if you are 8 I guess.

What Does a Hanger Do?

That was the first question Don Aslett, the cleaning expert, asked at the seminar he gave for our local homeschooling group this week. Of course all the kids yelled out, "It hangs up clothes!"

"No!" he replied as he let go of it and it fell to the floor. "It doesn't do anything! Who hangs up clothes? You do!"

The kids were absolutely mesmerized during the entire presentation. He showed them how to make their bed while they were still in it, how to clean a toilet, how to dust, vacuum, clean walls, etc. He was handing out toilet erasers and key chains left and right. He made it all look so fun and continually emphasized how it was the kids' job to clean up after themselves, not their Mother's. Yay Don!!!

If you click on Don's link above and scroll down In The News, you can see a video clip of him on a news show and how fun he is. He gave me a stack of his books that I will be giving away at my presentation this Saturday at the Forum. If you come to my class you may win one!

Speaking of teaching kids to work, Bonnie took my advice to heart last week and has been working with her kids ever since. She's turned some frustrating after school hours into a fun and productive family time. Go read her post, Change Is Good, for yourself. I loved it!

Here was my post last week on teaching kids to work, They Grow Up Fast Around Here.

Lovely Reading Time

Thanks for all your comments on my post yesterday. Stranger had one thing to say after reading it. "I feel sorry for all those poor kids of the mothers reading you blog!" But he doesn't really. He knows we're teaching our kids the right things. I just hope your kids don't hate me too much!

I spent some time today labeling all my posts related to teaching kids to work and re-loading the photos that were lost on them. If you're interested you can go back and see some of the progress and changes we have made over the last year or so. There are also a few goofy videos of my kids doing chores.

Click here to see all the posts. I will work on answering your latest questions as soon as I can.

In other news...

After Lovely was all ready for bed last night I asked her to go get in bed and read while I took a shower and then I would come tuck her in.


When I got out of the shower my two older kids were running around playing and this is where I found Lovely. In bed reading!!! I've told you before that she will put herself to bed but it still amazes me.

You know I love all my kids right? I definitely don't have any favorites. Of course not! It's just that this one is so sweet and agreeable that she has spoiled me. I'm scared of what the new baby is going to do to our lives. You can't get this lucky twice.

Decorate-A-Cake-A-Thon

Victor had his Boy Scout Blue and Gold Banquet today. All the boys are supposed to make their own cake but as you can imagine it doesn't usually turn out that way with parents getting in the way. Last year we planned something too elaborate and I ended up doing most of it. This year Victor planned it himself, baked his own cake (from scratch I might add) and decorated it himself. It took him ALL day. It might not have been the fanciest cake at the party but we thought it was the coolest.

And I know there wasn't another boy there who was more excited about his creation. We started a new tradition this year of having the kids make their own birthday cakes. They have had a great time and it has relieved me of a lot of pressure. Not that it's not a lot of work to supervise them because it is. I have to be in the kitchen every moment to answer questions and help when they ask but they love it so much that it's well worth it.

Lovely's birthday is tomorrow so Victor baked her a little cake to decorate. That's two cakes out of the way in one day! I will have to show you her sparkly finished creation tomorrow.

I also want you to know how proud I was of myself. I didn't plan one single other thing today. Nothing! I reserved the entire day for cake making.

Normally I would have planned 52 other things and then been frustrated with myself and everyone else that it was all going wrong and I was a frantic mess. Nope. Today was a good day.

They Grow Up Fast Around Here

It might look like she is just playing with her doll but she is really undergoing vigorous training to help with our new baby when it's born in May. See how she's supporting the baby's head while she holds it? Thanks to her big sister she also knows how to change its diaper and not to poke her fingers in its eyes.

What chores do my kids do around the house you ask? All of them.

I was talking to my friend at the gym tonight about how my schedule is going to change when this new baby comes. I'm not going to be staying up late and sleeping in any more. I'll be going to bed and getting up with the baby. She joked about how my kids would have to start putting themselves to bed and I said, "Probably."

She said, "I don't know how you do it when your husband is gone so much. It's not like your kids can just take care of themselves while you're taking care of a new baby."

"Yes, they can. They had to take care of all of us when I was sick with this pregnancy," I replied.

She sounded doubtful, "My 19 and 20 year olds can't even take care of themselves!"

But it's true. There are very few things that my ten and eight year old can't do for themselves. My son even knows how to change the furnace filter!

The only thing I can think of right now that I have never let them do is drain a boiling pot of pasta but my son is strong enough to do it so I think I'm going to let him start. I don't let my eight year old daughter get heavy things out of the oven but if it's something light like a pan of cookies then she does it herself. They have been cutting with knives and working in the kitchen independently since they were six. In fact my two year old is starting to learn how to use knives. We hold the knife together to chop vegetables because I'm not allowed to do anything in the kitchen without her help.

Maybe we are weird parents but our kids are eager to learn and we feel like it's our job to teach them to be capable and responsible adults. What's the right age for them to start learning? How about when they're born? You don't wait till a baby is one before you start teaching them to talk. You talk to them the minute they're born. I also don't think there is an age when kids should start helping around the house. Well, I guess you could wait till they can walk before you have them mowing the lawn but whatever.

Basically here is my rule for working around the house. "If momma's working, everyone's working." That's it. And we work every day. I never ever ever clean after my kids go to bed. There are no cleaning fairies at our house. We always work together.

We spent two hours cleaning the house last night and another two hours this morning because we had company coming over for lunch. My kids worked right along side me the whole time. In fact at one point my son proudly informed me that I didn't even have to tell him what to do because he looked around and saw what needed to be done himself and then did it. It was true!

My two year old followed us around from room to room. We gave her little errands to run like getting the vacuum and putting things in the correct rooms. We all had a great time (not always the case by the way) and my son declared when we were done, "Maybe we shouldn't have made the house so clean because your friend might feel bad that her house isn't as clean as ours."

I assured him that there was NO danger of that!!! But I'm happy that he's proud of the work he does.

My ten year old son is in charge of

• Rinsing, washing and putting away the dishes every day
• Washing, hanging and putting away his own laundry
• Buckling the two year old in the car
• Loading groceries into the car
• Vacuuming the van
• Getting the stroller in and out of the car
• Shoveling the sidewalks (a big job this winter!)
• Carrying heavy things for me and any other duty that makes him feel manly

My eight year old daughter is in charge of

• Picking up and putting away anything in the house that's out of place every day
• Clearing the table, putting the food away and wiping the counters after meals
• Putting the laundry away
• Helping me clean the bathrooms
• Organizing projects with me or on her own
• Taking her sister potty
• Putting the grocery cart away

My two older kids are both in charge of

• Keeping their rooms clean and picking up after themselves
• Keeping the van cleaned out
• Feeding the animals
• Bringing in groceries and putting them away
• Cooking meals by themselves and with the family
• Vacuuming is my job but they help me with it when I ask them to
• This summer they will start helping with yard work because we haven't had a yard for the last two years.
• Anything else their father and I ask them to do, whenever we ask them to do it

My two year old (three on Thursday) is in charge of

• Making her bed
• Getting herself dressed
• Putting her dirty clothes in the hamper
• Hanging her towel up
• Hanging up her coat and putting her shoes away
• Helping her sister put her clothes away
• Picking up her toys and books
• Washing her own hair
• Brushing and flossing her teeth (I let her do it herself in the morning and we take turns at night)
• Bringing in groceries
• Passing out the scriptures and putting them away when it's reading time
• Helping me do laundry and cook meals and basically making everything I do more difficult and more fun!

After two years of teaching my kids they have turned out to be hard workers. The road has been a little rough because I didn't seriously start training them to work until they were 6 and 8 and by that time they were pretty set in their slovenly ways. Things will be easier with my two year old because she doesn't know anything different.

I just want to add that there is a huge difference in kids when they turn eight. I think that is the magic age for them to work independently and take responsibility for doing a good job. Before that they need a lot of supervision and it's best if you can work together or at least in the same room because they get distracted easily. My daughter turned eight last month and it's like she has changed overnight. She is making her bed now without me reminding her and she has surprised me in all sorts of other ways.

If you are just starting out teaching your kids to help around the house my advice is to start slow, work together and don't give up.

Teach Your Kids to Work

Wonderful Opportunities for Raising Responsible Kids

This contest is closed. The winner of the book was Christine Rockwell. Congratulations Christine!

Opportunity is missed by most of us because it is dressed in coveralls and looks like work.
Thomas Edison

Our homeschool group invited Debbie Bowen to speak at one of our sharing nights for Mom's several months ago. She wrote a book called W.O.R.K., Wonderful Opportunities for Raising Responsible Kids. I made sure I went because teaching my kids to work around the house has been one of my big projects these last two years. It took about a year to really get into the swing of things and I learned a lot along the way, a lot of things I would have already known if I had just read Debbie's book first!!!

To save yourself the trouble of figuring it out the hard way like I did, pick up a copy of Debbie's book right now. Immediately! I wrote a few articles on the subject but her book goes more in depth and answers a lot of questions you might have as you go along.

Debbie is the Mother of ten so she has many years of experience in teaching children. She understands that it takes a family, not just a Mother, to run a household.

As the parent, you are not a soloist but rather the conductor of your own home
orchestra. You need not, in fact, you should not try to do all the work
yourself.

No matter what ages your children are it's never too late, or too early, to start teaching them capability, dependability, and responsibility and Debbie can show you where to start. She says delegation is the key to your sanity and she will lead you step by step through the process.

If you aren't already teaching your children to work you probably have many excuses including,

• I can do it faster myself.


• If I want it done right I have to do it myself.


• I find the work enjoyable.


• I'm a creature of habit.


• I'm not organized enough.


• I feel sorry for them.


• My children aren't capable.


• My children are too busy.


• My children complain.


• My children refuse to work.


• They're too old to change.


• My children expect to get paid.
  

Debbie answers all these concerns and more. I wish I had been given this book the day my first baby was born. It would have saved me a lot of trouble. First I had to learn that it wasn't my job to do everything for my children. That took about five years. And then I had to figure out how to teach them to do things for themselves. That has taken another three years. It's been a long road but I know from my experience that it's possible. People often ask me how I have time to do all the things I do. To me it doesn't seem like I do much but even so I couldn't do half of it without my children's help. I'm finding out that they are my greatest asset so I think I'll keep them around!

To win a free copy of Debbie Bowens book, W.O.R.K., leave a comment on this post telling me what your favorite and least favorite household chores are. Make sure you also leave contact information through your blog or e-mail so you don't miss out on your opportunity to win.

Children's Chore Carnival

Chilihead is hosting a carnival today on chores and allowance for kids so of course I have to participate because this is a subject of great interest to me. In fact it's been our family "project" for the last year and a half. I'm not sure if it will ever stop being our family project because there is so much to learn on the subject but I will share what has worked for us so far.

This is a series of articles I wrote about teaching kids to work. The bonus is that it has taught me to work more efficiently as well. My nine year old wrote the last article for me.

Part I, Whose Job is It?
Part II, Getting Rid of the Clutter
Part III, Let Them Help
Part IV, It Takes Time
Part V, Work Together
Part VI, Learn to Practice
Part VII, Make it Easy
Part VIII, by the Gallagher Boy

He also wrote an article describing his allowance and how he saves and spends money.

How a Nine Year Old Would Spend $50

Here is my article describing Mom First Credit Union from my perspective. I cannot tell you enough how great this system is. IT'S EASY AND IT WORKS!

Debt Proof Your Kids

We have changed a few things since that article was written. The kids don't write checks to me anymore. They just keep track of their spending and earning in a checkbook register that they keep in a small Organizing Bag along with a calculator and pencil. But the deal is the same. If they don't have their register, they don't spend any money.

I have also raised their allowance considerably and they have many more responsibilities than before. For example, now they have to buy their own socks and shoes because I think paying for them themselves helps them take better care of them. Eventually I will have them buying all their own clothes as well. Victor has to pay for all his own Scouting costs. I pay for the kid's art lessons but they have to buy their own supplies. Basically, anything they want to do or buy that's not family related, they have to pay for themselves.

They are paid their allowance once a month and according to Janine Bolon, the kids can use 40% on their expenses, put 20% into long term savings, 20% into short term savings, 10% goes to tithing and 10% they give away to anyone as philanthropy. Of course they never spend 40% so most of it just stays in their "checking" accounts. They have so much money in their savings accounts that Stranger is going to take them to the bank this week to buy some CD's with it so they can start earning a higher interest rate.

You really must check out Janine's books, Money...It's Not Just For Rich People, and Cash Cars and College that was written for kids. She is fabulous! In fact I like them so much that I contacted her and she is going to send me some to give away! As soon as I get them we will have a fun give-away here on my blog so make sure you check back.

My kid's allowance is not tied to their chores in any way. They do chores because they're part of our family and they do them every day without complaining. I mentioned this in one of my articles but I think most parents want to know how I get my kids to do chores without complaining. The biggest key to having cooporative kids is consistency and habit. If they are doing chores every day then they know what to expect and there is nothing to complain about. Kids whine and complain when it is effective. If you have kids that act like this then they are getting what they want by this behavior. My kid's lives have never been improved by whining or complaining so they almost never do it. Of course they have to try it occationally just to make sure it still doesn't work but then they go back to being their sweet selves.

If you would like help building positive new habits for yourself or your kids then please join us every week for Smart Habit Saturday. It's been an amazing experience for all of us who have participated in it this year.

Don't forget that I'm not an expert but if you have any questions for me I will answer them in the comments. Thanks for visiting!

She Will Amaze and Astound You

Remember when I said a two year old couldn't learn to hang up her clothes?

I lied.

I present this video not so much for her hanging skills but more to display her dramatic talents. Slow motion meltdowns are my favorite. Very entertaining.




More talent. For a split second I almost believed her sincerity.





I took this video when she was going through a whole "Stupid Mommy" phase that I am really missing now.

I can't remember if I posted this video last time but let's just look at it again for the adorableness of it, shall we?

More On My Persistent Assistant

I mentioned several days ago that I have a new helper around the house. I took her on board as an experiment but it has worked out lovely so I've decided to keep her. She's a very hard worker and the best part is she's free! Sometimes I have to give her a Dumdum to keep her happy but it's a very small price to pay for her quality of work.

In case you don't know her already, she's my seven year old, Persistent, and she showed amazing organizing superpowers at a very early age but she tends to be just like her Mom most of the time, too lazy to put anything away! We have been fighting about her bedroom for years and even though I have taken some drastic measures it is still a challenge keeping her focused long enough to clean her room.



As most of you know, I have been working very hard this last year to teach my kids how to work and help around the house. My nine year old son has been doing his jobs amazingly well but I was still struggling to keep my daughter working long enough to accomplish anything. I was frustrated by how much supervision she required and I felt like I was spending so much time checking up on her that I couldn't get my own jobs done.

I finally came up with a new plan that I thought would solve all our problems and it has. Since she works well with constant supervision I would give it to her by making her my own personal assistant. Together we are getting so much more accomplished than we did alone and there is no fighting, no reminding. I am loving it!

Victor washes all the dishes every day, takes out the garbage and cleans out the car once a week. That leaves laundry and the rest of the house for Persistence and I to clean. We go through every room together until the whole house is neat. I straighten and she picks up toys and items that don't belong and puts them away. She picks up garbage and moves chairs while I vacuum. While I'm mopping she has a scrubber to get the sticky spots as I go. We fold laundry together and she puts it away while I iron or start another load. Once we are done making the whole house look presentable we focus our efforts on one room for organizing and deep cleaning. You should see us, we are amazing! Seriously, I should sell tickets.

When I explained this new arrangement to Persistence she was not excited. She thought she was going to be doing more jobs and working a lot harder and she was right! But little did she know how much she would enjoy working with me and I enjoy it too. It's fun being a team and seeing what we can accomplish together. The other morning when Persistence woke up she came to me and excitedly asked what room we would be organizing that day. I think I shed a few tears of happiness at that moment.

The moral of this story is to keep trying new things with your kids until you find a system that works. Don't give up!

Presenting the Gallagher Boy

I know I said I wasn't going to write anymore articles on teaching your kids to work so I didn't. At least not this week. Instead I asked my nine year old to write one for me! Isn't he so sweet?

Teach Your Kids to Work, Part VIII by the Gallagher Boy

We didn't want to disappoint his fans so we produced another video for you. Don't pay any attention to his flatware washing technique. Ewwww! Let's just say he was a bit distracted with all the filming and questions, ok?



Part I, Whose Job is It?
Part II, Getting Rid of the Clutter
Part III, Let Them Help
Part IV, It Takes Time
Part V, Work Together
Part VI, Learn to Practice
Part VII, Make it Easy
Part VIII, by the Gallagher Boy

Kids Can Hang Up Their Clothes

Years ago I decided that if a three year old was old enough to dress himself then he was old enough to learn how to hang up a shirt. I tried and tried with my oldest but he just couldn’t seem to get the hang of it until I came up with a system for him that is fast and easy. Now we all use it.

Lay their shirts in a neat pile. Have your child count them and then get the same number of hangers out of the closet. Teach them to slide the hanger in without picking up the shirt. They will fold the hanger forward and then do the next shirt the same way. After there is a hanger in every shirt they just grab the hangers as a group and hang them in their closet.




Just so you know, this doesn't work with a two year old but we are going to keep practicing. (note - A two year old can do it!)



A three year old can learn it after a couple tries. Since I don't have any three year olds my nine year old is demonstrating it for you. Try it. It is fast and easy!



If you're new to my blog, check out my articles at GNMParents on how to teach kids to work.
Part I, Whose Job is It?
Part II, Getting Rid of the Clutter
Part III, Let Them Help
Part IV, It Takes Time
Part V, Work Together
Part VI, Learn to Practice
Part VII, Make it Easy

I have to make a plug here for Smart Habit Saturday. If you want to change your life by making positive new habits then come play along!

Find other great tips at Works For Me Wednesday!

Teach Your Kids to Work, Part VII

Look how much fun it is to hang up your own clothes!

Check out GNMParents for my latest installment. Can you believe I am still writing these things? I think I've got it out of my system for a while though and will be moving onto new topics unless anyone has any specific questions for me about teaching kids to work. I've had you ask what jobs specifically that my kids do and about all I can say is, most things terribly and few things well!

It's my nine and seven year old we are talking about and here are the jobs they do.

Daily
They clean their own rooms
Feed, water and clean up after animals
Do laundry for themselves and the whole family
Iron their own clothes, they're still not very good at this
Pick up after their little sister and themselves
Wash, dry, and put away dishes
Clean bathrooms
Clean out the van
Cook meals and clean up, we all do this together
Carry groceries in and put them away
Change diapers and feed, clothe and take care of their two year old sister when I ask

Weekly
Vacuum out the van
Sweep the front porch
Mop floors

Monthly
Clean walls

I'm sure I have forgotten some things but you get the idea. What do I do you ask? Plenty! Just supervising and teaching these activities is a full time job. Plus I do all the organizing, the deep cleaning and trying to make sure things are running smoothly. I can't tell you how much help my kids are to me though. For instance, when we come home from the store the kids bring the groceries in and put them away while I get dinner started. When they're done with the groceries they help with dinner.

The last time I had a friend over for dinner all the kids were running around playing when my nine year old came in the kitchen and said, "What can I do to help Mom?" My friend was dumbfounded and probably wondering how much I had paid him to say that!

Put this on your to-do list: Teach my kids to say, "What can I do to help Mom?" It is music to a Mother's ears!

I just want to say one more thing. My kids are not any different than your kids. They would rather be making messes that cleaning them up. Teaching them to work without complaining has been hard. I have spent many days yelling and frustrated but I am learning patience because the yelling does not work. I have seen amazing results over time as I consistently work with the kids and you can too.

Just because you are the Mom doesn't mean you have to do it all alone. Are you ready for your promotion? Then get busy and start teaching your kids to work!

Part I, Whose Job is It?
Part II, Getting Rid of the Clutter
Part III, Let Them Help
Part IV, It Takes Time
Part V, Work Together
Part VI, Learn to Practice